Ch-ch-ch-changes

So much has been going on in our day to day lives that I haven’t been keeping up with here, other than in short notes here and there. We started our childcare swap, with grand success; Leah began her PhD program, which has been a joyful thing for the most part (and I’m excited because I get to go over genetics with her!); Leah finished her job at the law firm that she started working at a couple of weeks after Darwin was born; Darwin turned one…which I still have to write up; we’ve had visits from friends and family…and on and on.

So many things and so much writer’s block. I’ve been trying to make myself write at least once a week, but I’m starting to realize that it’s not that I don’t have things to say, it’s that there are things I’ve been sensoring that I really want to talk about instead. Most of these things are weighing in my mind in good or stressful (or both) ways, but are not things I want to be generally known by everyone in my life. Or, more to the point, I don’t want to cause drama with anyone. I’ve been trying to decide what to share, with whom, at what point, and I’ve come to the conclusion that I just need to make some posts private. I’ve been avoiding it, but for now I think it’s the way to go.

Do you have people in your life who create drama constantly? I think overall we’ve done a good job avoiding it in the past several years, but there are some people who cannot be excluded entirely from our lives, which makes some situations sticky.

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9 thoughts on “Ch-ch-ch-changes

  1. In my mid-20s when I was going out a lot, I had a friend who relished drama and caused a lot of it in our social circle. Some people just thrive on drama. It sucks.

    Like Emily mentioned above – what if the drama creating person (people?) ask to read the private post — would that make the situation worse, when you say ‘no’?

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  2. Yeah some people seem to go out of their way to create it when there isn’t any going on. I have chosen to distance myself from those people just to protect my own sanity. I can’t handle drama. Sucks the life out of me.

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  3. It’s only a few of my family members who create drama for us, and we minimize involvement but can’t totally cut them out. As for blogging, no one in my real life knows I have one, except my wife and she doesn’t read it. Maybe it’s time to create another blog and be more selective about who knows about it?

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  4. I write things that I never post A LOT just to get it out of my head and that has so far helped. I don’t think anyone is exempt from drama and I have had my fill of late. I just know if I write about some of it and post it, it will cause even more drama. Good luck friend! I know it sucks.

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  5. I had a blog I wrote in for three years before the one I have now. I was sad to leave it behind, but I had lost control of it’s audience and felt I was censoring myself on every sentence. It felt suffocating and I wasn’t getting what I wanted to get out.

    I feel that way often even now. The larger my audience, the more I just don’t want to write. I’ve toyed many times with the idea of reaching out to a few people and giving them access to a strictly private blog, but I enjoy the dialogue and community too much to make that jump. Maybe one day.

    I hope you find a way to write, even if it’s just for you. I know it’s easier said than done, but if you do PW protect posts, don’t apologize for controlling who sees your content. If you don’t want to hand out a password, don’t. Everyone needs space to be themselves and to control who sees that.

    I’m excited all of your changes have been going well! Best of luck to your wife on the PHD program. Squish Darwin for me. She’s just the sweetest.

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  6. I struggled a lot when I realized that my anonymous blog wasn’t anonymous at all. (I guess I’m just not that stealthy?) I’ve made the decision to keep writing and to not password protect, mainly because of how much I’ve benefited from other people’s writing. That said, I’m definitely more hesitant to write about certain topics, knowing that a selection of friends/acquaintances might be reading.

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